I miss football season but what do I have to be excited for the upcoming college football season? Arkansas is predicted – cue drum roll and fireworks – 4th in the SEC West. Wait, you mean that didn’t surprise you?
The normal Quarterback Carousel of Mediocrity is still in running order in Arkansas (although Ryan Mallett gives the RazorNation hope). The only reason why we are hinging on Mallett helping us make The Leap is because he played for Michigan. As a back up for Chad Henne. Maybe we’ll have a Tom Brady Jr. for a year. These were his stats for 2007:
11 games, 892 yards, 7 TDs and 5 INTs.
Sounds like vintage Razorback quality with Casey’s stats in ’08:
11 games, 2586 yards (357 attempts), 23 TDs and 14 INTs (according to ArkansasRazorbacks.com).
Coupled with the Big-Ten experience and 2nd-year, pass-happy Bobby Petrino, welcome to the Rebel Alliance, Luke and Obi-Wan. This is our new hope.
Hey, at least we have a new turf field to play on! Hopefully that’ll help out our secondary (which gave a league-high 22 passing TDs last year). I know Casey Dick would have like to have that turf field for his pick-sixes running back at him; two of which he got juked out of his shoes diving for. I saw it personally. Sept. 9 vs. Alabama: Casey Dick threw two interceptions (out of 4. FOUR!) that left him the last passenger on Oceanic Flight 815 lost on the island and he definitely didn’t protect Frank Broyle’s house by whiffing twice and watching ‘Bama defense celebrate in the endzone while picking the grass out his helmet and mouth. My friends and I were thoroughly surprised by his ability to go horizontal, however; it was probably the most passionate attempt to save face for the dreadful season.
You’ll think I’m crazy, but I can’t get excited about our football season unless we beef up our non-conference schedule. Aren’t we tired of playing teams from the Football Championship Scrubs (formerly known as Division I-AA), and struggle to run up the score? If that’s how we gain our pride, let me tell you: I’ve seen the bars of Dickson after victories and after losses; it’s pretty much the same atmosphere. For once, I’d like the Hogs to lose a game like the end of Bad News Bears (Billy Bob Thornton version) where our players spray O’douls all over Florida after they proclaim their new respect for us even in a loss. And then constantly make fun of them and their mothers, then suggest what they can do with both of those statements together. Honestly, how can we get better when we don’t play those that are better than us outside of conference? I really don’t mind if we get our asses handed to us all season long because we’ll always win the Hardest Schedule Award.
The warden in The Longest Yard (Adam Sandler version) said it best when he got the prisoners to make a team to play against instead of push-over city teams to make the guards better before the Prison Guard season started.
